In previous threads, I have seen some blame cast on people that probably don't really exist. I'm talking about the Mythical Virgins of 'Gen Pop' who just show up because they've heard of this really awesome party and they go around leaving trash behind and mooching on all the free drinks and free love and free entertainment "WE" provide. DUH! You dipshits; they're all cute when they're virgins! That's why YOU invited them. They ARE the free entertainment and they're earning all our free love and free booze at a very high cost to their spiritual education! BE GONE ALL YE SINNERS AND HYPOCRITES! You bought them their tickets, pointed out the websites, gave them rides or directions, encouraged them to wear bizarre and sexy outfits, helped them get wasted, as they helped you get off...
and YOU WERE THAT VIRGIN ONCE!

Have you forgotten so fast, ya old geezers? Them whipper-snappers is the reason we keep coming back here fools!
Now get off my lawn! Pass me my walker. I'm heading up to the MAIN STAGE to make an announcement...

TAP-TAP-TAP...IS THIS THING ON?

BY PROCLAMATION OF THE BURNING ARTS COUNCILS OF...
Pisst, cat, away!...
AND, Yowymtryin Tatahkear...
AND, Hey'yer dew-init rawng...
AND, IT'ZTIL TEWLOWD!...
AND,oh-Whut-daPhuk?

"The Missionary Position" is hereby declared The Art Theme for Playa Del Fuego Spring 2010

PDF never had an Official Art Theme before, like Burning Man had since 1999.
{Yeah, 1998's "Nebulous Entity" didn't count as a Playa Art Theme, IMHO}
PDF is now TWICE as OLD as the 'Art Theme Era' of Burning Man.
Because we have twice as many years in a decade than it does,
Thus Our Metropolis has evolved twice as rapidly...
An uncharted outpost of an ancient people untamed...
Now invaded by a proselytizing horde from the future!
Behold, is Nothing Sacred?
Rejoice, Re-educate and Repeat!

"Yeah, that's it. I'm done. Here's your microphone kid, thanks. And, hey, would it be cool with you if I left my scooter plugged in here for an hour or so? It needs a recharge real bad. I'll be taking a nap right over there by the helicopter. Try not to play anything too fast...I won't be napping alone, if ya catch my drift?! Ya got any Marley? That would be nice."

So the theme basically works like this. Old-timers take responsibility for teaching the new-comers what's been learned over the years without scaring anybody away. Unless they're too easily scared...and then who cares, right?

To that end, I have dredged up some notes and stuff about "MOOP" from old PDF WWW's and the www.various.blah and I have not bothered with a frikkin' bibliography. If you feel I quoted you without due recognition, PM me if you're serious and I'll apologize, or just Reply to this Post if you're not really serious but just want to bust my chops anyway. Sue me if you want. I'm judgment-proof!

Dedicated to "The Mythical Virgins of Gen Pop", with Love!

MOOP = Matter Out Of Place
"MOOP is so much MORE than just ordinary trash."
It's dropped or blown-away items of ANY material.
Basically it comes in 4 categories:

Category 0 - Might be LOST? Somebody wants it back, but for now it exists only in their minds! Category "Zero" rarely causes a problem because, until it is FOUND, it is only a memory. [But if it was something the loser would like back, someday perhaps he or she could fill out a form like I placed under a different topic entitled "I AM A LOSER" because I think it will make my friend Smelly Melly laugh.]

Category 1 - It was FOUND. Somebody may want it back when they realize where they left it. It would be nice of you to hold on to it until their memory and your memory synchronize. Or the finder can help the loser to rely on the "Goodness Of Da System" by re-gifting it to the LOST & FOUND DEPT.

Category 2 - It was FOUND, but the person that left it behind does NOT want it back. It has become 'shit' to them, but unless it is found at Whisky & Whores, it is not the same kind of #2 that can be left in the Porta-potties. So it needs to be put in the dumpsters, or else it is MOOP. Yes, Virgins...NOW you know why MOOP rhymes with POOP. "It's really best when everybody puts their own shit in the right place." - George Carlin

Category 3 - Usable stuff like leftover food, utensils, blankets, tent stakes, clothing, soap, rope or dope. Hey, I find LOTS of this stuff when I am on a "Moop Walk" and sometimes I re-gift it to the dumpster, or Trader Travis, or to Scratch's Costume Camp, or the Lost & Found Dept. or I gave it to Marvin? It really just depends on how I feel about MY find. It was Matter Out Of Place. It couldn't stay where I found it, so I put it someplace else. MOOP Team Volunteers may not have more fun, but we sure do have more STUFF!

As for these people who pick up MOOP, they can likewise be divided into 4 groups:

A - Camp Mates! (which is really ALL of us at PDF, except the Vets, on whose land we're camping.) You should pick up what you put down, and not rely on your camp mates to pick it up for you. After all, if they were to pick it up too soon, you might call them a thief? But if you leave it lying there for so long you forget about it, but they remember, that makes you a liar!

B - Aliens! "PDF has no visitors, spectators, customers or strangers to blame for MOOP in the morning. All non-participants get vaporized each day at 4:20 AM by Marvin The Martian. Then he leaves in his flying saucer, taking nothing but millions and millions of tiny brain cells." So really, there is no point in worrying NOW about what MOOP that "B" found and hauled away. Worry instead about what YOU found. It wasn't left by aliens. Get real. "Everyone participates at PDF in one way or another. Some participants leave a mess behind. Don't be that behind!" And even if aliens DID leave a lot of bottles, butts and candy-wrappers behind, just accept that you were enjoying their company so much the night before, that they might have left you empty, smelly, dirty, broken gifts. If your camp just leaves those 'gifts' piling up, your camp will attract even MORE aliens, bearing MORE gifts, the next night!

C - Clean-up Crews from a PDF Volunteer MOOP Team, which is invisibly commanded by the "LBO" [Explained under a different topic entitled "LAST BURNER OFF"] This group is as real as you imagine it to be...kind of like aliens, come to think of it?!

D- Clean-up crews from the Vets. ALL MOOP found by "D" is left by "A" ...always! Neither "B" nor "C" are responsible for ANYTHING left behind by one, or many, of OUR camp mates. The Vets should not have to clean anything up, but inevitably they do. And when they do, they have the right to write what it was, and where it was found, on a MOOP map. But some MOOP may blow from one location to another before the final MOOP map is made, so maps can never solve the MOOP problem by themselves; ultimately it is all OUR problem.

It is OUR responsibility to "leave no trace" and it is our collective, shared goal. Our meeting that goal ultimately is measured by the people who remain when we leave. Ideally, we should leave behind only good memories.

It is YOUR responsibility to LEAVE NO MOOP.
That applies to any matter that you imported onto the Playa:

If it might blow away, STRAP it down. Gifts-by-breeze are rarely welcome, unless they smell good.

If it is something you don't want to blow away or 'walk away' while you're not there to watch it, then you should put it behind your tent FLAP. Out of sight is out of temptation. Borrowed and stolen items are just another form of Matter Out Of Place from where they should be. Most of us know who belongs in a neighbors tent, but few of us know what belongs to whom if the owner leaves it sitting out. So before you walk away, remember the breeze might pick up while you're gone.

If it is "household" trash, it may go in the dumpster, but if it is ash, it only goes on the ash dump. Ash & trash may rhyme, but they go in different SCRAP piles. Whenever possible, we try to keep the two places near to each other, but never start your own ash dump. Only dump ash where it is marked safe to do so, and ash should already be there to verify you found the right place. "Ashes to ashes" Before you walk away from leaving your trash or your ash, remember the breeze might pick up while you're gone.

Finally, "Road Spill" is one more type of MOOP that PDF may cause. This is that stack of poles or parts that get tied down to roofs of cars and vans. Even though you're tired and you just want to get on the road home, WRAP that stuff up well; remember the breeze will pick up while you're going.

Buh-bye, and get it off my lawn!